Nightmares
by Golden Shards
Summary: "'Mikasa? What're you doing up' Mikasa slowly turned to see Eren, standing there at the end of the hall in sleep clothes, looking at her confused. She immediately turned away as she realized her appearance. She couldn't let him see her like this, weak with tearstained cheeks and trembling limbs." Got deleted a while back, maybe a bit OOC, reviews and tips are welcome! (Oneshot)


She awoke with a start, as she always did on nights like these. Her head was pounding, sweat was pouring, and her breaths were labored. Looking around, concealed by the cover of night, Mikasa could vaguely make out the outlines of her female classmates sleeping soundly after an exhaustive day as Trainees. Krista's ladylike breaths were a vague contrast to Sasha's thunderous snoring, Mikasa thought, trying to keep her mind distracted with idle thoughts to prevent the horrid events she had dreamed up a few minutes ago to come flooding back into her mind. Even the thought of thinking about distractions _to_ distract from the cause resulted in a rush of gruesome pictures to flash through Mikasa's mind. She remembered as if it were yesterday; watching her father naively answer the door, seeing the chair her mother sat in fly back as she stood with a start, and witnessing both of them lay still in a pool of red.

Mikasa began to tremble, cursing herself inwardly for still being like this. She was not a child! Yet, why? Why did her stupid body react like this _every damn time_ she had a nightmare?! She was supposed to be over this, she was supposed to be **stronger** than this. She felt useless, caged, and horrified; the exact same way she felt as she watched her mother fall to the floor, almost gracefully on that day. Ripping off the covers, Mikasa forced her shaky legs to move. She had to get out. She didn't care where, she just had to leave this room that made her feel confined, caged like a little bird. Stumbling out of the room, leaning against the wall for support, she hobbled down the hallways, not knowing where she was going, but determined to get there. Now the tears were flowing, and she swiped them away, desperate for her weakness not to show. Her vision focused in and out, blurry and discontorted, but she kept going, like she always did. It was only that voice that stopped her.

"Mikasa? What're you doing up?"

Mikasa slowly turned to see Eren, standing there at the end of the hall in sleep clothes, looking at her confused. She immediately turned away as she realized her appearance. She couldn't let him see her like this, weak with tear-stained cheeks and trembling limbs. He asked again, his voice more wary and concerned.

"Mikasa?"

She fought to take control of her voice, to make it come out strong and sure as it normally did, prepared to reassure him that everything was okay, that she was going for a glass of water, that she was okay by herself, that she was fine alone.

Alone. That one word gripped her heart with iron fists. That's what she was after all, right? That's what she had been since her parents had died, and she had managed just fine all this time. Lonely, but fine.

Footsteps padded toward her cautiously, slowly, but deliberately.

"Mikasa, is something wrong?" Eren asked cautiously.

She readied her voice, ready to pretend and act like she was okay as she had all those years. What came out devastated her.

"Eren…" she croaked out in a whisper.

Mikasa was done. She couldn't do this anymore. She couldn't pretend everything was alright anymore. She couldn't pretend that **she** was strong, flawless, and invincible anymore. The trembling intensified and the tears fell once again.

Eren, detecting the agony in her voice, immediately rushed towards her, putting a hand on her shoulder, but keeping a respectful distance away. "Mikasa, what's wrong? Are you okay?" He was shocked when Mikasa turned towards him and clutched onto the front of his shirt like it was a lifeline. Holding both her shoulders now, he could feel her trembling, and hear her quick, labored breaths.

"Eren…" she whispered again, almost inaudibly, this time allowing more of the hidden pain to enter her voice. The quiet sobs now began to echo in the hallway as Mikasa shook in his arms.

To say he was shocked was an understatement. This was Mikasa! She was the strong one, she was the one who always protected him (as much as he hated it) and Armin, she was the one who could take anything thrown at her…and she was here, crying in his arms. Eren looked at the top of her head, felt her trembling hands fist his shirt, heard the quiet cry's in the hallway, and suddenly realized none of that mattered. Slowly, he leaned his back against the wall and slowly slid down, still holding Mikasa. He gently pulled her a little closer, and absently began to stroke her hair at her nape with his thumb.

Mikasa began to quiet as she listened to Eren murmur in her ear. _'It's okay, it's okay,'_ She was startled at his change in character. Those words reminded her of when she was small and had a nightmare. Her parents would come running in her room, her father holding her in an embrace, her mother stroking her hair, both of them murmuring the same thing. _'It's okay, it's okay,'_

The tears stopped, and Mikasa shifted, resting her head in the curve of Eren's neck, her nose brushing his jaw as she moved. He didn't stop or pull away as she'd expected him to do, instead just sat there and continued as she closed her eyes and took solace in his comfort. After many minutes had gone by, he spoke.

"Are…Are you okay?"

"I'll manage."

Mikasa's voice had returned to its usual state, steady and sure, but a hint of sadness still managed to creep its way in. Eren tightened his hold on her.

"Nightmares?"

She was slightly startled by how he knew, but nodded her head anyway.

"Yeah, I know, I get them too sometimes…you wanna talk about it?" he asked hesitantly, unsure of whether it was appropriate or not.

Mikasa was silent for a few moments, debating whether or not to speak when Eren did.

"I mean, it's okay if you don't want to. It's not like I'm forcing you too, or, uh-" he said quickly.

Mikasa gave a small smile as she heard the normal Eren return. She gave a small shake of her head and she untangled herself from his embrace and stood. "Thank you." She said quietly, looking down at him as he sat against the wall. His cheeks colored almost unnoticeably, as he cast his gaze down and muttered something she couldn't hear.

"You know…you're not alone…" he suddenly said, looking at her with set, strong green eyes that she had come to love. Mikasa's eyes widened as she listened. "You have me, and Armin. We're all together…so if you need anything…you know…" he looked away, put his hand on his nape and blushed. "We're here. I'm here." He lifted his eyes to hers reluctantly.

Mikasa smiled at that. "Yeah, I know," she whispered. "Thank you, Eren. For tonight, and…everything," she whispered. "Goodnight." She gave him another small smile and turned and walked away back to her barracks, leaving him a little confused.

"Everything?" he wondered. Watching Mikasa as she walked down the hallway, he shook his head slightly, and gave a small smile of his own, realizing it didn't matter. "Goodnight, Mikasa." He whispered as he watched her turn the corner, hints of a smile glinting in his eyes, happy to be able to support her after a long long time.


End file.
